


Freeze Frame, Pause, Rewind, Stop

by ObnoxiouslyZukka



Series: Hindsight, Silver Linings, and Blindsides [2]
Category: Avatar: The Last Airbender
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Gen, Hakoda (Avatar) is a Good Parent, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Sokka (Avatar) Needs a Hug, Sokka (Avatar)-centric, Sokka is 23, Sokka processing his emotions, Trans Zuko (Avatar), Zuko is 24, background bakoda, background kataang
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-09-30
Updated: 2020-09-30
Packaged: 2021-03-07 20:29:15
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,423
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26723680
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ObnoxiouslyZukka/pseuds/ObnoxiouslyZukka
Summary: Now Sokka was just sitting in his car in front of the hospital, hands gripping the steering wheel despite being parked, staring unseeingly through the windshield. He knew he had to go back in. Zuko was waiting for him so they could go meet their daughter.Anyways, he had only left so he could change from his blood-soaked clothes but now he just couldn’t get himself to go back inside. Frozen, thinking about all the moments leading up to now. Honestly terrified of seeing what sort of condition the baby was in and even more terrified of the conversation that would follow.Sokka wasnotready to be a father.Yet, at the same time, the thought of giving up their daughter was accompanied by the rather unpleasant feeling of rusty nails being driven through his heart.The shrill sound of his phone ringing startled Sokka out of his thoughts, heart racing and hands trembling as he fumbled to grab it and look to see who was calling.It was his dad.Shit.(This is the second part of a series, though reading anything past the summary of the first part - which I'm also putting in the notes at the beginning of the story - is not necessary.)
Relationships: Sokka/Zuko (Avatar)
Series: Hindsight, Silver Linings, and Blindsides [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1888069
Comments: 47
Kudos: 288





	Freeze Frame, Pause, Rewind, Stop

**Author's Note:**

> Hey everyone! It's been a while since I've updated this so um... sorry <3 I really appreciated all the nice comments on the first part, though!!
> 
> So in case you didn't read it or need a refresher this is essentially what happened in the first one without the graphic-ness of it (...it's literally just the summary lmao):
> 
> _“Hey, sunshine,” Sokka managed, voice cracking a little, as those beautiful brown eyes he loved so much finally opened to stare up at him._
> 
> _“Hi,” Zuko muttered, raspy and quiet and confused. His eyes widened as they trailed down to stare at the blood stains splotched all over Sokka’s hoodie and jeans. “W-what… happened?”_
> 
> _“You… Um…” Sokka hesitated, swallowing audibly and trying to discreetly wipe away the tears rolling down his cheeks. “You… had a baby. In our bathroom,” he managed with a disbelieving laugh that came out as more of a sob. “And then - then…” Sokka’s words were thick and a struggle to get out around the lump in his throat. “Y-You almost… b-bled out,” he managed shakily, sniffling softly as the adrenaline started to wear down and a myriad of feelings started to seep in._
> 
> And now Sokka is just trying to come to terms with it all - with help from Dadkoda.
> 
> Anyways, I hope you all like it!! Please leave a comment if you'd wanna see more of this series <3

Sokka hated leaving Zuko alone, especially after making such a huge decision together, but Zuko needed something warmer and more comfortable to wear than a flimsy hospital gown and Sokka needed to change into some clean clothes. At least ones that weren’t covered in blood. 

Especially since they had chosen to at least meet their daughter, still unsure on if they wanted to keep her or not.

If they _could_ keep her or not.

Either way, Sokka didn’t want to hold his daughter while still covered in blood.

He’d taken a taxi home but there was no reason not to drive his own car back (except for the fact that he couldn’t really focus on anything - the memory of finding Zuko and the baby in the bathroom playing over and over in his mind - and may or may not have run one or three stop signs on his way.) 

But now Sokka was just sitting in his car in front of the hospital, hands gripping the steering wheel despite being parked, staring unseeingly through the windshield. He just couldn’t get himself to go back inside. Frozen, thinking about all the moments leading up to now. Honestly terrified of seeing what sort of condition the baby was in and even more terrified of the conversation that would follow. 

Sokka was _not_ ready to be a father.

Yet, at the same time, the thought of giving up their daughter was accompanied by the rather unpleasant feeling of rusty nails being driven through his heart. 

The shrill sound of his phone ringing startled Sokka out of his thoughts, heart racing and hands trembling as he fumbled to grab it and look to see who was calling.

It was his dad. 

Shit.

Sokka numbly watched the call record as ‘missed’ but then his phone was ringing again and he had no choice but to answer. Clearing his throat softly and trying not to sound too weird despite all of the crying he’s been doing making his throat feel raw.

“H-Hey, Dad,” Sokka’s voice trembled, barely holding back a fresh wave of tears as he finally answered.

“Hey, kiddo, where are you guys?” Hakoda asked - his voice sounding far away despite Sokka having the phone to his ear.

“Ummm…” Sokka frowned. “What…?” he asked distantly, sniffling softly and hoping his father didn’t pick up on it. 

“It’s Tuesday, kid. Family dinner night,” his father responded, voice softening and starting to sound concerned. “Are you okay, Sokka? Did something happen?” he asked, soft and serious.

Sokka didn’t answer. His brain refusing to go through the needed steps to comprehend the question and compute an answer for it. Utterly distracted by the sound of an ambulance siren that he couldn’t tell was real or in his mind and hot tears spilling over before he could even try to stop them. 

Before he knew it the silent tears turned into painful sobs and all he could do was curl up around himself, pulling his feet up onto the seat to wedge his legs between his chest and the steering wheel to maybe slow down the way he was shattering into pieces. 

The fact that he had enough mind to put his phone on speaker and drop it into the cupholder beside him instead of on the floor was a miracle in and of itself. 

All of the fear, anxiety, and terror that’s been continuously shoved down throughout the last few hours with a mix of adrenaline and heavy dissociation bubbling over explosively now. He was drowning in it, hardly able to breathe between sobs, choking on his own tears, reality hitting him like a semi-truck and forcing him to actually process what happened.

Sokka had no idea how long he was crying like that for but eventually his father’s voice filtered in between the heaving sobs and coughing. 

Calm and even, just a hint of worry showing through as Hakoda talked Sokka through slowing down his breaths. Talking in the same calm, deep tone he did when Sokka was little and scared or when he was telling Sokka and his sister bedtime stories. 

Slowly but surely, Sokka managed to even his breathing out until the harsh sobs were nothing more than little hiccups and sniffles. He had no idea how his father was able to do that so well but he really needed to learn if he was supposed to be a dad. 

“Sokka, do you think you can talk to me now?” Hakoda asked softly. “I just need to know if you and Zuko are okay,” he added before giving Sokka time to talk. He grabbed his phone from the cupholder so he didn’t have to yell for his father to hear him but hesitated as a thought crossed his mind.

He and Zuko hadn’t talked about telling anyone yet. Then again this wasn’t really something that they could hide. Even if they gave up the baby, Zuko had quite a bit of recovery ahead of him from the sounds of it and no matter what this was going to change their lives. 

“U-Um… Y-Yeah. Kinda. Uh,” Sokka said eventually, words coming out all weak and hoarse. “Um… We - I-I mean Zuko… he um… I-I guess he was uh p-pregnant and… w-we didn’t know until… until he had the baby. L-Like a few hours ago,” Sokka managed, wiping at his face with the sleeve of his hoodie and trying his best not to dissolve again. 

“Oh,” Hakoda choked out. “Wow. Um. Okay. Okay. Uh - How’s Zuko doing? Is he okay?” 

Sokka nodded before remembering that his father wasn’t actually there with him. “Yeah,” he said after a moment. “I-I mean… considering everything. He’s - they said he’ll be fine,” Sokka managed, not entirely sure how to answer. 

Emotionally they were both a mess. And physically… well they got the hemorrhaging under control. Zuko didn’t look quite as deathly pale anymore, but he was still in a lot of pain. Sokka guessed that was to be expected, though - the doctor said Zuko had an ‘impressive’ amount of tearing that needed _thirty_ stitches and Sokka has been actively trying _not to_ think about how thirty stitches could even possibly fit in that area. Either way, it sounded horrifyingly painful.

“That’s good. And… the baby?” Hakoda asked, a little hesitant. 

“Um… She’s in the NICU - they said she was a few months premature. But… she’s doing okay. Better than expected, I guess. We uh… we haven’t seen her since we got to the hospital,” Sokka said.

“Since you _got to_ the hospital?” Hakoda asked. “Where - Sokka, where was she born?”

“Oh uh… our bathroom,” Sokka said slowly. “I… didn’t see it happen but I got there like right after, I think.” 

“You’re at the hospital now, though, right?” 

“Yeah. Well, I’m in the parking lot. Um… actually, Zuko is probably waiting for me so we can go and… see her,” Sokka said, trying not to sound as terrified as he felt about that.

“Okay, yeah. Do you want me there?” Hakoda asked.

“Yes,” Sokka breathed in a rush of air before even thinking about it but not daring to take it back. “Please,” he added. 

“I’m on my way, then, kiddo. I’ll text you when I get there,” Hakoda said and just knowing that his father was on his way lifted a huge weight off of Sokka’s shoulders. 

“Okay. I… I don’t know if Zuko will want visitors, so…” Sokka trailed off, the thought crossing his mind just then. 

“If he doesn’t want to see me that’s alright - I understand, he’s been through a lot,” Hakoda assured, “I’ll just bring a book to read and, if he doesn’t want to see me, I’ll sit and read in the waiting room. Then I’m still there in case you need me.”

Sokka couldn’t stop the small smile tugging at his lips. “Thanks, Dad.”

“I’ll be there soon, kid. I love you.”

“Love you, too,” Sokka said before hanging up and slowly uncurling himself from the ball he had been in.

Sokka took a few deep, steadying breaths before finally grabbing the bag of clothes he got for Zuko and getting out of the car to go back inside. His thoughts weren’t quite as scattered and jumbled anymore, not feeling quite as overwhelmed and out of touch. 

Talking to his dad usually had that effect, though, and Sokka just hoped he could eventually be as good of a father as Hakoda. If they kept the baby, at least.

Despite everything, Sokka was starting to hope they would. 

**Author's Note:**

> (Quick note in regards to the small mention about the tearing and stitches Zuko had - I just want to clarify that, yes, the baby was a preemie and, consequently, smaller but also keep in mind that Zuko is trans and being on T for a while can make things *down there* more fragile.)
> 
> Anyways, I hope you liked this little addition <3 Leave a comment if you wanna see more from this series and/or if you liked it! Seeing nice comments always lights up my day even if they're small <3
> 
> (Edit: Yes, I edited it to show there's going to be a Chapter 2 and added some tags. I decided to add a short part-two which is going to be Hakoda's side of the conversation feat. some very worried background interference from Bato (Bakoda rights, y'all), Katara, and Aang (because... Kataang, ofc) that Sokka didn't pick up on because he was having a breakdown.)


End file.
